Now there's a man you'll hear about most anywhere you go And his holdings are in Texas and his name is Diamond Joe He carries all his money in a diamond studded jar Never took much trouble with the process of the law Well I did up to Diamond Joe boys, did offer him my hand He gave me a string of horses so old they could not stand And I never starved to death boys, he did mistreat so I never saved a dollar in the pay of Diamond Joe There was bread it was corn dodger and his meat he couldn't chaw Nearly drove me crazy with the waggin' of his jaw And the tellin' of his stories, I mean to let you know That there never was a rounder that could lie like Diamond Joe I tried three times to quit him, but he did argue so I'm still punchin' cattle in the pay of Diamond Joe And when I'm called up yonder and its my time to go Give my blankets to my buddy, give the fleas to Diamond Joe